Robin's Nest

 After bringing SIL home for the night and the next morning, I realized just how much time I spend focused on keeping her safe. She was in the same room with me all. day. long. Except for sleeping, I had her with me. Why might you ask? Partly, for safety, when I went outside, she would follow, tripping every few steps on her own feet and the unlevel ground. Yet if she was left inside there were dangers there also. She has poor safety awareness. A watermelon on the counter was a game of hide and seek. Okay that sounds weird, let me explain.  When SIL first came to live here she was pretty immobile. She could not make her legs work so she stayed mainly in her room. As she became a little more adventurous, she also became more delusional. Most of my good knives and scissors lived on magnetic strips in the kitchen. I had DH hang another strip in the laundry area so that all really dangerous sharps could be kept out of reach. I also insisted that he install a locking handle on the ...

 Yesterday, we made up our minds to have a sleep-over, for the adults. DH is out of town, and it is a lot to go across town and drag two kiddos out 6pm and be out until after 9pm. The solution for last night was to bring SIL to the house. Monday night, as I headed out with the youngest to go help her to bed, the youngest tripped and was in pain. The majority of the pain was a result of being overtired and not willing to stay with her cousin while I did the bedtime routine. I thought it best to let the staff handle bedtime. The end result was a phone call between 3am and 4am from a staff member that could not find a solution to the behavior that was occurring. With me on the phone for the better part of an hour we talked through the frustration that was plaguing both SIL and the staff. That is what prompted the sleep-over. I did honestly believe I could just put her into DH's empty bed, and all would be well. Nope. Solution? The couch. I remembered to bring out extra blankets, and P...

 It is Sunday morning, there is a Fall-like chill in the air. The dogs were up at 0400, one of them had been gagging as if they were about to throw up for some time. Having cleaned up their vomit just yesterday I elected to get up and let them out of the house. Usually, they are out by 5 am but sometimes it is as late as 0630. On those days I have regret as they most certainly have done something naughty. When I put them out on a normal day, I close the doggie door and make them remain out for at least an hour. Today I did not lock their door. I went back to bed and tried to go back to sleep. Sleep did not want me. When I went to the bedroom, the bigger dogs were at the baby gate. There barking outside that was annoying me, it was a little dog. He was sitting outside the house on the back step. He seemed to "assume" the doggie door was locked. I pushed the plastic door several times and then a big dog went out it. Then the little dog came in, the barking did not stop. Usually...

 There are only 3 days left to the final hearing for the adoption of the girls. It has been a long journey and as far as we know this is really it. Although we also thought that in May, and it wasn't. June has been such a busy month and yet it seems to be dragging along at the slowest pace ever. Even our plans for the summer have been moving, well really, they have been at a stand still waiting for this day. I am amazed at how much it affects my whole life. We cannot go on vacation, I cannot send DH to clean the rest of the stuff out of the Montana house, I cannot make permanent plans for SIL. all because I cannot make a thoughtful decision because I am pre-occupied with the distractions of the "final" hearing. The stress level this month has been off the charts. SIL having challenges in the facility, tweaking my knee, kids out of school, incessant texting from an absent parent, waiting for the closing, finding out someone has cancer, kids moving home after a home sale, a...

 Yesterday when I went to put SIL into bed for the night, I had the chance to talk with the nurse that was on duty when the incident occurred. Her nonchalant attitude really hit me the wrong way. She admitted that she never bothered to look at the "bruise" that was reported to her. It was more than that to me though. She did not seem to care that SIL sat with a broken bone all day when she could have been seen at an urgent care. This week I will weigh the pros and cons of the environment that SIL is in. Yes, I understand that falls are going to happen, but neglect doesn't have too. I have had some time to think of the needs of both my kiddos and those of SIL. She certainly needs more than the facility is able or willing to provide. There was a poll a few years back that surveyed people about who was trusted more, a nurse or a doctor. Nurses won hands down. They obviously didn't poll people involved with the nurses of this facility! One day when I was entering the faci...

 Last night was a rough one getting SIL to bed and getting back home. All this came after a busy day and a trip to the surgeon for a follow-up on my knee. SIL kept getting back out of bed and that wasn't all that helpful. On Thursday I spent 5 hours at Fort Carson's EACH. shorts and winter boots wondering what all this costs to replace WHAT?! I can't touch?!?! By the time I returned home in the heat with no air conditioning I was exhausted! I attempted a short nap and twisted my knee, of course it was the surgical site. I ended up not going to help Kim get into bed that night. On top of that I cancelled her lab appointment this morning. Just wasn't feeling the fun of all of it. It is now Saturday, and a little progress has been made. The living room is rearranged, again, eventually I will find the right set-up and it will stay that way for more than a month. Tonight, I go to put SIL into bed and start my 7 day a week support of her. With the granddaughter testing positi...

 It is a long week already and it is only Wednesday. I have been encouraged by others to cut my ties with toxic relationships. It is hard to do. I am working on it though. In fact, I have received texts messages that imply that it is becoming effective. Also, I am working a new situation for SIL. DH recently found some property that really checked all the boxes for what we need in a long-term living situation. This resulted in more stress for me as I started researching the "what-ifs". Not necessarily bad stress. Tomorrow is the deadline for the bids to be placed. At this moment we will not be bidding on the property. If the deadline were 10 days later, we absolutely would. However, it did get the ball rolling for dreams to happen. So, he can keep looking and maybe something similar will appear. Quick intense update. I cannot just rip the band-aid off of the care situation. I have made progress. My granddaughter is going to go over every Saturday and Sunday night to get SIL m...