Today is the 4-year anniversary ...

 Today I got up and didn't even consider what day it was until I went into our bedroom to get my clothes ready for church. Frankly, I really didn't feel up to going to church today, but I vowed with the kids homeschooling that we would go, if at all possible, no matter how much I felt like not going. I had weird dreams last night. Weird enough to remember too. As I entered the bedroom DH asked if I knew what day it was, I said yes, the 8th, not thinking about the significance of the day. He had barely got the thought out of his mouth when it registered that it had been 4 years since our home had burned to the ground.

Maybe the dreams tied in with the date, maybe they didn't. We chatted a bit and I went to make the morning coffee and get the girls ready for church. The youngest put forth a fuss, but not much of one. The older one came out of hiding and poured herself a bowl of cereal and immediately retreated back to her room. We talked a bit longer and then DH headed off to church and the significance of the day left with him. I also retreated to my room and looked for something to wear, fixed everyone's hair and headed for church.

The girls like to fuss on the way there and get on each other's nerves as best they can. I think it is done so that they can ask forgiveness and feel they are participating in the service. Okay, I am just guessing on that note. But one can dream. Before leaving for church, I had placed chicken in the crock-pot along with the ingredients for ranch chicken sandwiches or something like that. While sitting there listening to the sermon and smacking one kid or the other for transgressions against each other, I remembered that I forgot an ingredient. The ranch dressing mix packets, I did not have any, but I had my homemade seasoning for ranch dressing mix. I pondered if it would taste the same, but only for a moment as it was time to sing. I "forced" the girls to stand and sing. Normally I don't, but it is a new year and well they made the service disruptive for me so they could enjoy me disrupting them for a bit.

The chicken wasn't quite finished when we got home so I threw the ranch mix that I made into the pot and let it cook a bit longer. Next thing I know my phone is dinging. It is the neighbor south of me. It seems the neighbor to the south of her is having a bonfire of the same quality that we had four years ago. I stepped out into the yard and sure enough the house was fully engulfed. It brought back memories that I really don't want to relive. I did not even think of going there to see what could be done as the fire department was there and frankly, there isn't anything you can do at this time. At least there wasn't anything that I remember wanting the neighbors to do for me when it was my turn. The neighbor in between us will let the rest of us know if we need to do anything to help.

Or at least that is my hope. I will try to take time tomorrow to see if there is anything that they need or that we can do to ease the transition. It is not fun to have this happen to you, and I made light of it when it was me going through it, but I did it to avoid thinking about it. I do think about it more often than I care to admit and maybe that is why it is hard for me to leave the house to go to work, Of course, having the youngest call me a half dozen times an hour doesn't help either.

With that I will close this post and say good night blog!